Celebrate all your hard work with golf at Pine Valley.
Saturday, Sunday and Monday! Open till Noon 18 holes w/cart $25 or 9 holes for $19.50
Noon until 6 pm 18 holes w/cart for $21 or 9 for $15
Book online or call us at 330-335-3375.
Have a relaxing and enjoyable Labor Day Weekend.
Did you know that the State of Ohio Code 4301.62 does not allow you to bring your own alcohol in to a premise with a liquor licence.
No person shall have in the person’s possession an opened container of beer or intoxicating liquor in any of the following circumstances:
(2) Except as provided in division (C) of this section, on the premises of the holder of any permit issued by the division of liquor control;
(a) Beer or intoxicating liquor that has been lawfully purchased for consumption on the premises where bought from the holder of an A-1-A, A-2, A-2f, A-3a, D-1, D-2, D-3, D-3a, D-4, D-4a, D-5, D-5a, D-5b, D-5c, D-5d, D-5e, D-5f, D-5g, D-5h, D-5i, D-5j, D-5k, D-5l, D-5m, D-5n, D-5o, D-7, D-8, E, F, F-2, F-5, F-7, or F-8 permit;
So please leave your adult beverages at home, we have plenty cold and ready to go.
The Lost CityThe team of archeologists had been toiling deep in the Amazon jungle for months and months, clearing choking undergrowth away from the faint traces of the great Lost City.
Their wonderment grew with each passing day as they revealed more of what had been hidden by the jungle for millennia. They discovered broad winding avenues with giant flagstones; the avenues all leading to circular areas every few hundred yards, each of which had a perfectly circular hole cut into it. It had to be … an ancient golf course!
The find of the century, the archeologists thought. Imagine, ancient tribal peoples playing golf! Any doubt was dispelled by the discovery of drawings showing human figures using primitive prototypes of golf clubs.
The archeologists new that tribal oral traditions passed down legends of ancestors, so they set about interviewing the local tribesmen. Amazingly, members of the tribe still told tales of their ancient forebears who followed a daily ritual with clubs and balls … until tragedy struck.
One archeologist was speaking to a wrinkled, aged elder through an interpreter. “Imagine,” the archeologist said, “golf was played here for centuries, then it simply disappeared from history, not reappearing until the 15th century in Europe. If only we knew why they gave up golf … ask the elder if his tribe’s oral histories say anything about the nature of the tragedy that forced his ancestors to give up the game.”
The interpreter asked the question, and the tribal elder gave his reply. The interpreter turned to the archeologist, who waited with great anticipation.
“It’s simple,” the interpreter said, relaying the elder’s response. “They couldn’t afford the green fees.”
We had a nice rain yesterday and the heat is gone and today is a great day to come out and golf.
Open tee times until 3:00 o’clock so call and set up a tee time.
Chuck was a popular member at the golf club, but he just finished up a terrible round of golf and wasn’t in the mood to visit the clubhouse after walking off the 18th green. So he headed straight out to the parking lot and started changing his shoes.
Just as he was closing the trunk of his car, a police officer spotted him. The policeman, stern-faced, walked over to Chuck and asked, “”Did you tee off on the sixteenth hole about thirty minutes ago?”
“Yes,” Chuck replied, “yes I did. Is something wrong, officer?”
“Did you happen to hook your tee shot?” the policeman asked.
“Yes, I did,” replied Chuck.
“Did your ball fly over the trees and off the course?” the policeman asked.
“Why, yes, it did,” said Chuck. “Why are you asking me these questions?”
The police officer replied in a very serious and stern manner: “Your ball, sir, flew out onto the highway and crashed through a driver’s windshield. That driver’s car went out of control and spun into a guard rail, where five other cars hit it. Then a fire truck, that was racing to a fire, smashed into the pileup!”
The policeman’s voice was rising with consternation. “The fire truck couldn’t make it to the fire, and the building burned down! All that because you hooked a tee shot!”
The policeman was red-faced, and he paused to catch his breath. “What do you think you should do about all this?” he finally asked Chuck.
Chuck was a sensitive man and an upstanding citizen. He thought it over for a minute, then replied.
“W
ell,” Chuck said, “I think I’ll try opening my stance a little.”
Celebrate all your hard work with golf at Pine Valley.
Saturday, Sunday and Monday! Open till Noon 18 holes w/cart $25 or 9 holes for $19.50
Noon until 6 pm 18 holes w/cart for $21 or 9 for $15
Book online or call us at 330-335-3375.
Have a relaxing and enjoyable Labor Day Weekend.
The only reason I play golf is to bug my wife.
She thinks I’m having fun.
The weather is beautiful so why not come out play nine or eighteen. Tee times available both Saturday and Sunday and you have two ways to reserve your spot. Book online at our website or call us at the clubhouse 330-335-3375.
It was a sunny Saturday morning, a little before 8 a.m., I was on the first hole at The Oaks of St. George Golf Club and beginning my pre-shot routine, when a piercing voice came over the clubhouse loudspeaker:
“Would the gentleman on the woman’s tee back up to the men’s tee please!”
I could feel every eye on the course looking at me. I was still deep in my routine, seemingly impervious to the interruption.
Again the announcement: “Would the man on the woman’s tee kindly back up to the men’s tee.”
I simply ignored the guy and kept concentrating, when once more, the voice yelled, “Would the man on the woman’s tee back up to the men’s tee.
please?!?!”
I finally stopped, turned around, cupped my hands and shouted back: “Would the jerk with the microphone please keep quiet and let me play my second shot!”
Lee and Gary head out to the golf course for a quick nine holes. On the first tee, Lee turns to Gary and says, “What do you say we make this time worth something. Play you for five bucks?” Gary agrees, and they start their rounds.
It’s a great game, and the two lifelong friends reach the No. 9 tee box with Gary ahead by one stroke. After Lee hits a great drive, right down the middle, Gary steps up and promptly hooks a ball into deep rough and trees.
“C’mon,” Gary says to Lee, “help me find my ball. I’ll look in this patch of trees, and you look around over there.”
They look and look and look, but no ball can be found. The five-minute time limit on searching for lost balls is about to run out. Gary gets desperate. He gives a quick glance over to Lee to see if he is looking, then swiftly reaches into his pocket and drops a new ball into the rough.
“Found my ball!” Gary shouts out triumphantly.
Lee looks at his friend with great disappointment. “After all the years we’ve been friends,” Lee says, “you’d cheat me at golf for a measly five bucks?”
“What do you mean cheat?” Gary asks indignantly. “I found my ball sitting right here!”
Lee lets out a heavy sigh. “And you’d lie to me, too? All for a tiny little sum of money? You’d cheat me and lie to me, for what? For five bucks? I can’t believe you’d stoop so low.”
“Well what makes you so sure I’m cheating and lying, anyway?” Gary asks.
“Because,” Lee replies, “I’ve been standing on your ball for the last five minutes!”